Wednesday, October 19, 2016

#18 - Sacrifice (2016), #19 - Last Shift (2014)

Finished up late last night, so I didn't have time to finish yesterday's post, so I have two movie reviews for you tonight.  Both of them are actually decent, though I wouldn't say particularly outstanding.

Sacrifice (2016) is the story of a Obstetrician, Dr. Tora Hamilton (Radha Mitchell), who moves to Ireland with her husband after a miscarriage.  Hoping to adopt, she has to maintain a residence on the island for a year to satisfy the residency requirements.  Unfortunately for Tora, while digging a grave for her dead horse, she finds the body of a ritually-sacrificed woman buried in her back yard.  As an Obstetrician, Dr. Hamilton recognizes that the corpse recently gave birth, and tries to assist with the investigation of the murder.  The local police seem more than ready to brush the corpse under the rug, which only makes Dr. Hamilton all the more passionate to solve the murder...

The Good:  In some horror movies, all hell is not about to break loose.  Some of them are just good, old-fashioned psychological horror.  Sacrifice is that rare breed of psychological horror that isn't a cheap Psycho knock-off, but a well-done, thoughtful exploration of the kind, charming peoples of rural Ireland.  Honestly, if this is what rural Ireland is like, I never want to visit there.  Makes backwoods psycho chainsaw murderers in the USA look like fluffy bunnies.  (shudders)  Acting was good, ending was even halfway decent.

The Bad and The Ugly:  No nudity that I recall, unless you count the gutted bog-corpse.  I wasn't fond of Sacrifice, not because it wasn't a good movie, but (small spoiler) because there weren't any actual monsters in it.  If you've read my blog, you know I like monsters.  Fake ones, of course.  Real ones scare me.  Like, big spiders.  Monstrously creepy.  Clowns.  Creepy.  Men with back hair.  CREEPY.  Other than that small problem, this was an excellently done psychological thriller that I wouldn't watch again, because there's no goddamn scary monster in it.  You can catch it on Netflix if you like that kind of horror.  Only question I have is, when police tell someone to keep their noses out of police business, why the HELL does that person ALWAYS ignore that advice?  So stupid!  Who does Dr. Hamilton think she is, Jessica Fletcher?  This isn't "Murder, She Wrote!"  Also, who the hell takes a day off work to dig a grave for their own dead horse?  Ew.  Leave it for the husband to find.  Foolish woman.  Other than that, nicely done flick.  Moving on.

Last Shift (2014) is a tale, much like Assault on Precinct 13, of a police station about to be shut down.  Unlike Assault on Precinct 13, the action in this particular film doesn't happen by chance.  Officer Loren is a rookie cop assigned to babysit the old station until a Hazmat team can come down and dispose of the last of the evidence in the evidence locker.  Unfortunately for Officer Loren, the Hazmat team is delayed, and wouldn't you know it, the police station she's in happens to be haunted.  What rotten luck!

The Good:  This movie wasn't bad.  Decent acting, Officer Loren (Juliana Harkavy?  Never heard of her) manages to carry the entire movie all by herself, with minimal assistance.  Which makes her like, the Tom Hanks of horror, if Tom Hanks was completely unknown, and a woman.  Special effects were reasonably effective, nothing particularly outstanding.  Typical jump scares and atmospheric horror.  Plot was coherent and easily followed.

The Bad, The Ugly:  No nudity, which is bad, because officer Loren isn't bad looking.  Still, she looks good in uniform.  Ending was predictable, from about the first 5 minutes into the movie.  A surprise ending would have been nice, instead, I got what I expected.  Wasn't a bad ride, but like getting off a roller coaster you've already ridden 100 times.  Catch Last Shift on netflix if you've a mind to.

In other news, I went out and took about a gazillion pictures of Fall foliage today.  Love that smell of the crisp leaves, drying and crumbling away on the ground out there.  There's still crickets out there, chirping here and there.  Late July to Mid-October isn't a bad run, but I kind of feel bad for those last few males still chirping out their calls this late in the season, because they expect snow in some parts of the area this weekend.  Most likely, their comforting songs will stop soon, and all that will greet me when I listen out my window will be the cold, dead silence of the long, long winter.  Makes you wonder what's wrong with those poor, poor few male crickets, still trying valiantly to attract a mate, no matter how old they are, knowing there's so little time left that they could DIE AT ANY SECOND.  Makes you wonder what's wrong with the females, that refused to mate with these poor determined crickets.  Doesn't perseverance count for anything, anymore?  Don't give up, little male crickets!  Keep chirping!  Don't go gently into that good night!  Rage, rage against the dying of the light!

Uh...  Ahem.  I am in no way comparing myself to an old cricket.  That's ridiculous.  How silly of you to suggest such a thing.  Well.  That's all for tonight.  Til tomorrow, then.  Yea.

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